He's Still There

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I have a lot more to say but not really a lot of time to sit down and focus my mind long enough to make a lot of coherent sentences. I have a running list of the things that I want to blog about. Unfortunately, that list keeps getting longer and longer so it may resort to me writing more than one blog post a day to get it all said. My most topic of choosing is a hybrid from an old topic that I have been wanting to blog about and a recent development in my life. 

Being in New York has had me surrounded by people of all different cultures and religions. There are people who look to thousands of different gods for answers. There are people who live adhering to a strict law in hopes that they will be one of the few to find favor. There are people who begin to put their faith in the protection of people around them. The people that surround me are all looking for something and there are people other than me that are out there hoping they can be the ones to give them what they want. There are two incidents that stick out in my mind as I write this. The first happened about a month ago after I had been on a tour with a mission group. We went into a Hindu store and as the team looked around, I picked up a book and began to skim through it. It caught my attention because it was about the gods and goddesses of the Hindu religion. In the book, it talked about the misconception that Hinduism does not have one main deity. According to the book, they do and it was described as the same kind of god as my God. The difference was that they also have all of these other gods that are created to reach us on every level for every need. Instead of having one God that can fulfill every desire, comfort every emotion, control every circumstance, they have multiple gods that are created with one distinct purpose in mind. That same night I couldn't sleep and so I began reading in Isaiah. I got to Isaiah 41:21-24 where the Lord challenges the false gods to do something, anything to prove that they have power. Of course, nothing happened. My find went flying back to my visit to the Hindu temple months earlier where I saw people giving food in hopes for a blessing, I saw them kneeling before the statues of their gods and my mind then wandered to me, crying out before my Father, seeing Him answer the prayers that I lift up to Him, seeing Him move through my friends and through circumstances. My heart began to ache for the people who don't know Father the way that I as His child know Him. I began to be burdened that no matter how much they strive to reach perfection, no matter what they do to find enlightenment and fulfillment, without an active God, they will always be missing something. 

This came rushing back to the forefront of my mind yesterday as I was riding the bus on my way to work. I have about a 45 minute commute during the week to work, a commute that I am grateful for more every day. I enjoy the time I get to spend in scripture as I ride from 7th Avenue to Avenue C. Yesterday was the same as every other day except that I was headed to work one hour later than usual. I sat down on the bus and began reading in Mark. Just one stop after I had gotten on, two ladies sat down beside me. They began to ask me how I could believe in something that was so riddled with contradictions and so full of people who said one thing and did another. I got to share with them my view on my faith and how it was much more to me than just rules to follow. One lady told me that she had been pushed out of the church and asked never to come back. She didn't tell me why and I didn't prod any further. She then proceeded to tell me that her "jesus" was whatever guy was taking care of her at the moment. My heart fell as my stop came into view. I didn't have much time with those two ladies and I immediately began praying as I made my morning walk to the church. I was thankful for the time that I had been given to share my faith and prayed that maybe something I said would lodge inside their minds like an annoying popcorn kernel lodges inside your teeth and it takes hours to get rid of it. I hoped and believed that that conversation was not in vain. 

Finally, last night I was reminded of both of these situations as I spent my usual time on the roof to close out my day. I find that the roof gives me a clearer perspective on things sometimes, and like I always say- it's all about perspective. But last night I decided to read some more scripture as I sat up there. As the Lord directed my reading, each passage spoke directly to my heart. I have been unusually sad lately and He led me to Psalm 42 verses 5, 11 and Psalm 43 verse 5 which all say the same thing. 

"Why am I so sad? Why am I so upset? I should put my hope in God and keep praising Him, my Savior and my God."

I had had to let go of some things that I really wanted, some dreams, some hopes and those things are never easy to do but Father led me to a verse in Proverbs 13 that says 

"It is sad to not get what you hoped for but wishes that come true are like eating fruit from the tree of life" (verse 12)

I have been thinking a lot about the disappointment of not seeing the fruit that comes from service sometimes, of sometimes never knowing the reason you went through something or spent time in a particular season of life. I started forgetting the fulfillment of every promise the Lord had made in scripture and Father led me to Habakkuk 2.

" It is not yet time for the message to come true, 
       but that time is coming soon; 
       the message will come true. 
    It may seem like a long time, 
       but be patient and wait for it, 
    because it will surely come; 
       it will not be delayed. " (verse 3)

He led me through scripture as my heart cried out to Him and I began replaying the memories of those ladies, of the temple, of the store and was jubilant that I have a Father who is active and cares for me. I think sometimes I forget that He doesn't think I am crazy because I have emotions, but instead He wants to guide me through those emotions to find Him. I was beaming with joy as I thought about each passage that the Lord had guided me to and how each one was so unbelievably fitting for every scenario that is currently going on. I was reminded that He's still there even when I don't make the effort to seek Him out or to find His purpose in all that is happening. I was thankful that I have a God who is alive and current and working to protect me by reminding me that He's always been there, that He's there right now, and that He will always be there, even unto the ends of the earth. 

So pray for these people that surround me, that surround you, that are searching for something but they are looking in the wrong places. Pray that someone is a beacon of light to them so that they may experience the living and true God that reaches us on every level. Pray that I will be given many more experiences to share my faith and God's love through that. Pray that you will be given those opportunities and that we both will be bold enough to seize them.